even odder google
July 02, 2002 | 1:05 a.m.

Everybody go to google and search for "[your name]is" (I searched for "Sarah is", get it?) You need the quotes or it won't work. I got over 70,000 hits, I would have listed them all but I think I'll lose a few people with the number I have already.

I'm so easily amused. I nearly did myself a mischief laughing at Jim Carrey in Liar Liar the other night.

I don't know if people know my name already, but yes, it's Sarah. I don't know why I've never mentioned it, it seems a bit pointless to keep it secret. I just won't disclose my second name.

On with the hilarity. Well, I can hope, can't I?

Sarah is now sixteen years old!
Yay!

Sarah is also on the cover of the magazines In Style and Seventeen.
Also? Like they're not enough?

Sarah is evil.

Sarah is here!
Right now, yes.

Sarah is currently on tour with Champions on Ice.

Sarah is in the swimming pool with her new eye.
Doesn't sound particularly sensible of me.

Sarah is a minister and through the instruments of sound, silence, state of prayer she unleashes glories of divine expressions of angelic chorures, rapturous..
There was more, but you get the idea.

Sarah is a beast.
Infinitely preferable to the above.

Sarah is Chair of the Committee on Jobs, Economic Development, and the Economy.

Sarah is proud to have been elected a member of the Vanity Club.

Sarah is country, disguised as rock n roll.

Sarah is at home and expecting...frogs.
It involved, well, spawn, and I really don't want to go into it.

Sarah is motivated by compassion to do good deeds.

Sarah is now 15 months old and quite a handful.

Sarah is first winner of new prize for outstanding achievement.

Sarah is getting ready to visit Mickey Mouse this summer, learn to swim, and to start school in the fall.
If only. I can swim, but I want to visit Mickey! Why can't I, mummy? Why?!

Sarah is so smittened with Ade that she begins to lose interest with Bethany.
I was stringing Bethany along from the very beginning, really. Don't tell anyone. I wasn't aware 'smittened' was a word, either.

Sarah is another of the golden guppies spawned by the Cricket Club.
Sounds like they have more fun in cricket clubs than I always assumed.

Sarah is fiercely independent and adamant about staying that way.

Sarah is a ghost!
*g*

Sarah is torn apart with jealousy.

Sarah is one of six young women selected, nationwide, for an "Essence" magazine article about "accomplished and self-determined teenagers."

Sarah is a coming-of-age novel.
I've been called a lot of things in my time..

Sarah is fortunate to have a daddy that works from home as an architect.
With an abundance of credit cards.

Sarah is not happy with this order.

Sarah is like me in a lot of ways.

Sarah is a simple nerd with insane passions for music.
Very basically, yes.

Sarah is a totally hard-core, tough girl.

Sarah is making herself ill by pretending to love her husband.
As my little brother is fond of saying, "In your next life." He's also fond of saying "She's been poked more times than a second-hand dartboard," but we won't go into that now. No, he doesn't know what it means, but I wish I'd had a camera to capture the expression on my Dad's face the first time he came out with it.

Sarah is back!
After two days, folks! What d'you mean you didn't notice?

Sarah is a design label especially for bigger women.

Sarah is set on the landscape of the West Virginia highway, where a bevy of truck-stop whores pass the time with moonshine and backwoods folk religion.
I think I'll pass.

Sarah is a down on her luck, single, thirty-three-year-old Southern Belle living in Dahlia House, her soon-to-be-auctioned-off family plantation in Zinnia.

Sarah is correct.

Sarah is an attractive thirty-one year old third year surgery resident.

Sarah is very popular with our regular clientele.

Sarah is available every weekend.
Also for marriages, birthdays, bar mitzvahs...

Sarah is getting some extra sleep in the motor home the last I checked and should be well rested and ready to go.

Sarah is a wonderful person. I would highly recommend her services.

Sarah is confident that her office is well-insulated and comfortable, since her clients have to be able to undress in order to have some of the treatments.
Some of the treatments?! That's it, I'm going into a convent.

Sarah is an excellent dog to leash walk and she prefers staying close to her companion but isn't overly shy.

Sarah is often sent into homes by a referring veterinarian to see if a client's dog can be helped.

Sarah is unquestionably #1.

Sarah is delighted with her latest victory.
Always.

Sarah is very attractive, cool and cunning.

Sarah is a yucky old Intel Impaired 386/DX40 with 8 MBs RAM and 2GBs HD.
Yucky? I'm crushed.

Sarah is paid $130,000 per year.
What is that now, £10,000? I'm joking. It's more like £5,000.

Sarah is the love of my life.

Sarah is sold into Kalid's harem.

Sarah is an interesting character that makes me anxious to see the next issue.
That's the idea.

Sarah is not an evil person, but when she relates to her mother, she often feels like one.

Sarah is unsure whether her attempts to fight her brother were a result of "J6's" brainwashing or something deeper.

Sarah is the prime suspect.

Sarah is being used for the glory of God.
How, exactly?

Sarah is an unlikely heroine.

Sarah is an only child and considers herself a workaholic.
No and no.

Sarah is a bright, happy one-year-old who loves exploring things, playing with other kids, and watching insects on the playground.
Not exploring other kids. Phew.

Sarah is killed along with some Chilean protestors she had been assisting.
Yeah, because I'm always assisting those Chilean... protestors.....ahem.

Sarah is Hebrew in origin, and means- you guessed it!- Princess.
Did you guess it?! Well, didja?!

Sarah is responsible for the early days of DatingFun and helping to get it off the ground.
It wasn't easy, believe me.

Sarah is a constant source of joy for us and we look forward to the years ahead.
*twitch*

Sarah is effective as a laundry prewash, or as an instant stain remover.

Sarah is the middle child in a family of eight siblings.
Things could be worse then.

Sarah is up to date with routine shots, already house trained, and spayed.
Plus I can fetch, sit and stay, but I'm having problems with wait and play dead.

Sarah is a natural leader and organizer.
Aaaarrrrrggggggggghhhhh!!!!

Sarah is the patron saint of canyons since before the great.
Ummm...?

Sarah is Fucking AWESOME!!! :)

Sarah is having some doubts.
No shit.

Sarah is able to incapacitate them both with the help of a fifty-five inch television and a well-placed blow to the head.

Sarah is too impressed to be put off and bunks off school again - only to be caught out by Mr Barlow.

Sarah is awoken in the night by a terrifying apparition. Is it a ghost or just a figment of her imagination? What is that unbearable noise?
It's that fucker Mr Barlow. Where's my fifty-five inch television?

Sarah is a no-nonsense cruiser.
You'd better believe it.

Sarah is a good administratrix.
Does that mean I tie my willing victims down with scotch tape and beat them with my stapler?

Sarah is looking forward to being a stay-at-home mother as soon as we have a child.
Come one step closer to me and I will cut it off.

Sarah is probably the best buy I have ever had.
I bet I'm the best anything you've ever had.

Sarah is known to talk, and likes to do it on the phone or online.
Really? I'm known to open my mouth and make articulate sounds with it? On the phone or online? I don't believe me, I'm such a little scamp.

Sarah is, of course, sweet, beautiful, affectionate, and adorable.
Of course.

<3
your favourite administratrix golden guppy

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