laughter in the dark

apathy
June 25, 2002 | 11:09 a.m.

So, I'm back at college again. I thought I was free for the summer after finishing the first-year exams, but apparently we have to come back until the end of term to prepare for next year. Sociology Teacher #1 left a snarky message on our machine asking why I hadn't been in the last couple of lessons, knowing full well that my parents were likely to get it.

This is good for people I know out in Diaryland though, because for some reason I always find it easier to write at college than at home. I don't know why, I hate it here. It's very strange. I suppose I feel more anonymous here, I'm not afraid of someone deciding to come and read over my shoulder. Not as afraid, anyway.

The delinquent using the opposite workstation to me just wondered aloud whether or not the site www.whyislifesocrap.com exists.

I'm too apathetic too check.

I've decided that I'm very immature, in fact that I'm probably the most immature person I know. In some ways I am very mature, more than a lot of people my age, but in other ways I am far more immature than them. I've never had a job, for example. I have worked temporarily in a few places, but that doesn't count as a real job. I think the shock of having my own money might be a bit too much for me.

Someone said to me yesterday "You look sad." I was thinking. I felt like telling them "Sometimes people think. It seems to be dying out lately, but people do still do it." Besides, I'll look sad if I bloody well want. It's my face, the world at large doesn't own a remote control they can use to dictate the expressions displayed on it. I'm not making anybody look at me, either.

This entry has been quite mediocre, all things considered. Sorry.

<3
gf

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